The Gospel, as seen by Mozart.

This year my university choir is performing Mozart's "Requiem."  I have sung bits and pieces of it in other choirs, and have never liked it.  A three-hour rehearsal last night, however, changed my mind.  It is only after I could get past the notes, rhythms, dynamics, vowels, etc. (to the extent possible) that I was able to find beauty in the piece.  It's the text in combination with the arching lines and soaring melodies which contain such spiritual power and aesthetic glory.

The dilemma: in this piece, we have a stunning example of a Gospel presentation.  But it's in Latin.  We have a captive audience who is willing to sit through the entire piece.  But they'll primarily be listening to the melodies.  We will print the English text in the program notes.  But the font will be small, the lights will be dim, and the Wheaton community is prone to recycling.

How can we captivate our audience so that the deeper meaning of the text cannot help but be grasped?  How can we convey God's unquenchable, undiscriminating love to our listeners?

Come, Holy Spirit.

Grant them eternal rest, Lord,

and let perpetual light shine on them.

You are praised, God, in Zion,

and homage will be paid to You in Jerusalem.

Hear my prayer,

to You all flesh will come.

Grant them eternal rest, Lord,

and let perpetual light shine on them.

Lord, have mercy on us.

Christ, have mercy on us.

Lord, have mercy on us.

Day of wrath, day of anger

will dissolve the world in ashes,

as foretold by David and the Sibyl.

Great trembling there will be

when the Judge descends from heaven

to examine all things closely.

The trumpet will send its wondrous sound

throughout earth's sepulchres

and gather all before the throne.

Death and nature will be astounded,

when all creation rises again,

to answer the judgement.

A book will be brought forth,

in which all will be written,

by which the world will be judged.

When the judge takes his place,

what is hidden will be revealed,

nothing will remain unavenged.

What shall a wretch like me say?

Who shall intercede for me,

when the just ones need mercy?

King of tremendous majesty,

who freely saves those worthy ones,

save me, source of mercy.

Remember, kind Jesus,

my salvation caused your suffering;

do not forsake me on that day.

Faint and weary you have sought me,

redeemed me, suffering on the cross;

may such great effort not be in vain.

Righteous judge of vengeance,

grant me the gift of absolution

before the day of retribution.

I moan as one who is guilty:

owning my shame with a red face;

supplicant before you, Lord.

You, who absolved Mary (Magdalene),

and listened to the thief,

give me hope also.

My prayers are unworthy,

but, good Lord, have mercy,

and rescue me from eternal fire.

Provide me a place among the sheep,

and separate me from the goats,

guiding me to Your right hand.

When the accused are confounded,

and doomed to flames of woe,

call me among the blessed.

I kneel with submissive heart,

my contrition is like ashes,

help me in my final condition.

That day of tears and mourning,

when from the ashes shall arise,

all humanity to be judged.

Spare us by your mercy, Lord,

gentle Lord Jesus,

grant them eternal rest. Amen.

Lord Jesus Christ, King of glory,

liberate the souls of the faithful,

departed from the pains of hell

and from the bottomless pit.

Deliver them from the lion's mouth,

lest hell swallow them up,

lest they fall into darkness.

Let the standard-bearer, holy Michael,

bring them into holy light.

Which was promised to Abraham

and his descendants.

Sacrifices and prayers of praise, Lord,

we offer to You.

Receive them in behalf of those souls

we commemorate today.

And let them, Lord,

pass from death to life,

which was promised to Abraham

and his descendants.

Lamb of God, who takes away

the sins of the world,

grant them eternal rest.

Lamb of God, who takes away

the sins of the world,

Grant them eternal rest.

Lamb of God, who takes away

the sins of the world,

grant them eternal rest forever.

Let eternal light shine on them, Lord,

as with Your saints in eternity,

because You are merciful.

Grant them eternal rest, Lord,

and let perpetual light shine on them,

as with Your saints in eternity,

because You are merciful.

Election anger.

Polarization:

A concentration, as of groups, forces, or interests, about two conflicting or contrasting positions.

Romney.  Obama.  For many people these days, one of those two names is enough to incite one's blood to boil.  I come down fairly strongly on this election, but I still have respect for the human dignity of the other candidate, and for those who agree with him.

This is my first chance to vote in a presidential election, but I am shocked by the level of antipathy demonstrated by supporters.  Why does a presidential candidate merit our loss of respect, disdain, and even hatred?  Even worse, why do people hate the supporters of the other candidate?  I would much rather people be informed and vote for the other candidate than to be bullied into voting for a candidate they don't actually support.

To undermine the validity of voting for one of the candidates is to undermine the importance and necessity of voting, and, thus, democracy.  In the long run, maintaining a democracy and advocating the importance of voting is more important than who will govern our country for the next four years.

In my opinion, the thing to support most strongly is the vote of the people, not who these people vote for.  Certainly, we are allowed to maintain our personal views, as I do, but we have to ultimately want and respect what the majority chooses.

Patriotically,

Amy

PS - I welcome any constructive criticism, as well as comments on why this election is so heated!

Muffin lust.

I LOVE to cook.  I LOVE to bake.  I HATE recipes.

Take today, for instance.  I went out for brunch with a friend, then came home and looked in my cupboard.  So much food just waiting to be consummated in deliciousness.  But I needed to do some homework first.  So I did.

I made risotto for dinner.  Yum.  Garlic, onion, olive oil, Arborio rice, chicken broth, Parmesan cheese, and a little love.  Makes me want to move to Italy just for the risotto.  And the rest of the food.  Gelato.  Wine.  Men.

More homework.

But the food composition wasn't over for the night.  I had some bananas in the freezer that were begging to be used.  But I was up for a challenge: healthy banana muffins.  Like really healthy.  No oil.  No butter.  No sugar.  Yep.  None.

Here they are:

[picture to come?]

Delicious.  The roomies and I almost died.

So what's in them?  Well.....

2 cups of flour
3/4 cups oats
4 thawed, mashed bananas
1 egg
1 large splash of vanilla
a big glob of plain, non-fat Chobani (maybe 1/3c?  No clue.)
A moderate splash of unsweetened applesauce
a scant tablespoon of baking powder
4 or 5 tiny packets of Splenda (until I realized I had...)
...2 good squirts of honey
2/3 regular-sized bag of chocolate chips (technically optional, but not for any sane person)

Oops.  I just realized I didn't add any salt.  Normally I would add a slightly large-ish pinch.

Obviously, my methods are very scientific.

Satisfactorily,

Amy

MD or RN? That was the question. [A tale of pride, inability, and trust.]

I wanted to be a lot of things during my adolescence: banana bread baker, dentist, teacher, music therapist, you name it.  However, during my senior year of high school, I thought I had decided on MD--OB/GYN, to be exact.  I grew up with society telling me that I could do anything I wanted, and my National Merit Finalist and high GPA seemed to be proof--if anyone could be a doctor, it was me.

Well, fast forward roughly two years.  I was now enrolled at Wheaton College, an academically rigorous, faith-centered university.  I was by no means failing any of my classes, but I was on the verge of losing a scholarship, a scholarship that was the reason my family could afford Wheaton's high tuition.  It was crunch time, and it was time to reexamine my options.  I had always known I wasn't a natural scientist.  It was my nurturing nature and people-oriented mindset that had drawn me towards medicine, not the thrill of being able to take microbiology and organic chemistry.  I knew I could significantly raise my GPA by not taking the pre-med science requirements, but I kept pushing onward, because I was terrified to admit that I couldn't do it.

I was the girl who had done everything: played eight instruments, balanced work with a social life and good grades, played sports, volunteered in church nursery, run a half-marathon, gone on missions trips, etc.  I honestly couldn't think of something I'd ever wanted to do that I'd discovered I couldn't do.  I was well aware that I couldn't swim to the bottom of the ocean or climb Everest (at least not without oxygen...), but, then again, I'd never wanted to.

But here I was, desperately wanting to be a doctor, and realizing it might never happen.  I finally acknowledged that I wanted to be able to be a doctor more than I actually wanted to be a doctor.  It was time to let go.  But man, did I put up a fight.  It seemed natural to fight against the part of me that screamed, "You're not cut out for this!  Maybe this isn't your best option!"

After a few agonizing months, I allowed myself to do some secret Googling on becoming a nurse.  I liked what I saw, especially when I discovered the nurse midwife program.  I was even more excited when I found out I wouldn't need to take physics, which is my least favorite subject in the entire universe.  A few more months later, and I worked up the courage to see the nursing advisor on campus.  I stealthily changed my major on Facebook to "Pre-Health," not "Pre-Med."  It wasn't pretty, but I was coming around.

I still gobble up medical documentaries like "NY Med" and medical dramas like "House," and my insides ache when I realize I won't be the one performing life-saving MacGyver-esque surgeries.  But, it's not all about me growing up to be a hero.  Certainly, nursing can also be a heroic career, but I had chosen doctoring as a profession primarily for its status and the awe it inspired in others.

I still wrestle with this on occasion.  I'm no longer fighting with God, though--I'm choosing to let Him win, knowing that in the end, I'll come out a winner, too.

And I'm pretty confident that I'll be one B.A. nurse.  (I may still have a little ego work to do.)

Optimistically,
Amy

Lawsuits (no, not smart 3-pieces worn by hot, studious bookworms. I wish.)

Hello, friends :)

Disclaimer: I am not engaged, married, or pregnant.  I have nothing earth-shattering to tell you all.  It seems that every one of my friends has announced one of these things in the past 17 hours, so I'd just like to point out that my life is as plodding and chaotically uneventful as ever.

What's taken me so long to post?  Well, I'm currently working 5 jobs and taking an online course, and things have gotten a bit hectic.  I'm also hosting a garage sale this weekend, but I'm happy to use this blog as an excuse to take a break!

I know, I know...I said no more political commentary for awhile--and this won't be commentary, I promise.  I don't even have a stance on this issue, just questions I would like rationally answered by informed people.  So here goes.

I attend a private Christian university that recently filed a lawsuit in the Washington, D.C. District Court against President Obama's proposed healthcare law, due to its coverage of "abortion pills."  Our board argues that this law requires Christians to violate their religious rights, while supporters of the law either don't believe these contraceptives induce abortion or put their priorities elsewhere, i.e. in making sure every American has access to healthcare.

I've seen very strong reactions to this lawsuit on each side.  Some people are angry that Christians are 'politicizing' their religion. Others just don't see the need for this lawsuit, especially from a school, or fear the lawsuit will only bring negative publicity to Christianity.  Others, however, applaud the board of trustees for taking such a bold stance against what they see as a violation of religious freedom.  They hope this will be the latest in a strong history of Christians standing up against human rights violations.

Where do I stand?  I don't know.  Where do you stand?  I'd love to hear your thoughts.

Food for thought.

Contemplatively,

Amy

PS - I'll be back this weekend to discuss the ups and downs of my first garage sale!  Hopefully there'll be more of the former than the later, but if not, maybe I'll at least have some funny stories for you.

PPS - The peach cobbler post may or may not ever happen...it's been baked, delivered, and even photographed, but I haven't had time to upload the pictures and come up with witty captions for them.  I recently bought two vanilla beans, so perhaps I'll just do some sort of demo with those.

Do I dare? A Christian's unusual take on gay marriage.

Alrighty.  Here goes.


In a previous blog post, I described myself as "a Christian who believes in gay marriage."  A family member invited me to clarify my views, so here I go.  While I stand by my position, I take no pleasure in writing this blog--in fact, I wrote it weeks ago and have been since trying to decide whether or not to post it.  It saddens me that this is such a divisive issue.  I will not think any less of anyone who respectfully believes anything else, and I am asking you to do the same.


Disclaimer:  I hope that this is a post that will open eyes and not harden hearts, embrace grace and not sin, and draw others to Christ.  I welcome dialogue, as always, but on this post especially I would ask you to weigh your words carefully, as I am, before commenting.  I am disappointed by the backlash I have already received regarding this issue.  I will not be linking this post to Facebook.


Let me start with the Bible's position on homosexuality.  As Christians, we choose to accept and abide by the words within it, so it must be the starting and ending point in any discussion of morality.  To those of you skeptical about Christianity, this part might sting, or even infuriate you.  Take a deep breath.  In, out.


You shall not lie with a male as with a woman; it is an abomination. - Leviticus 18:22


If a man lies with a male as with a woman, both of them have committed an abomination; they shall surely be put to death; their blood is upon them. - Leviticus 20:13


Surely you know that the people who do wrong will not inherit God's kingdom. Do not be fooled. Those who sin sexually, worship idols, take part in adultery, those who are male prostitutes, or men who have sexual relations with other men, those who steal, are greedy, get drunk, lie about others, or rob—these people will not inherit God's kingdom. In the past, some of you were like that, but you were washed clean. You were made holy, and you were made right with God in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and in the Spirit of our God. - 1 Corinthians 6:9-11


Bottom line: the Bible describes the act of homosexual intimacy as wrong.


Okay.  Another deep breath...in, out.  My fellow Christians are probably wondering how I could possibly argue for gay marriage after these verses.  Well, stay tuned.


These are the foundations for my belief in gay marriage:

1. I hold to the Bible's viewpoint that homosexuality, in PRACTICE, is immoral.  I do NOT hold to the view that people who identify as bisexual, lesbian, or gay are more sinful than those who identify as straight.
2. I strongly believe in the separation of church and state.  As one Internet writer puts it, "Since our government is secular and nonsectarian, any argument for making law should be likewise. If one's personal opposition to gay marriage is rooted in a theological stance, one should attempt to translate it into secular principles understandable by anyone no matter what their religion. 'My god said so' is not translatable that way so it has no place in the debate over law." I have yet to see a non-religious argument against gay marriage (i.e. effects on children, etc.) that does not have equally strong counter-arguments.  Do any of these arguments against gay marriage hold any water?  Maybe.  But it's dangerous to make such assertions when there is no semblance of consensus. Are Christians really willing to put all their marbles into the claims of a few scientists and a handful of studies?  If other studies disprove these in the coming years, Christians will be considered the laughing stock of politics--even more than they already are--and any case against gay marriage will likely die forever. 
3. I am thoroughly sick of homosexuality being treated as a "worse" sin than anything else.  The moment we attack active homosexuality, we must also attack lying, greed, and divorce with equal vigor.  Many Christians I know paint active homosexuals as disgusting freaks, while those who acknowledge struggles with pornography or greed are commended for their transparency and vulnerability.  To me, this is hypocritical--even Pharisaical.
4. America has always been about freedom and civil rights.  Homosexuals deserve the same legal rights as everyone else, as do other sinners, i.e. liars and the greedy.  If this means that gay marriage must be legalized to afford active homosexuals these rights (i.e. survivor benefits, healthcare, social security, etc.), then it needs to be legalized.  It is up to homosexual Christians to do the right thing by willfully abstaining from marriage, not by being forbidden from it.  [Read more about gay marriage and civil rights here.]

John Bryson Chane, an Episcopal bishop, writes, "Christians have always argued about marriage. Jesus criticized the Mosaic law on divorce, saying "What God has joined together let no man separate." But we don't see clergy demanding that the city council make divorce illegal."  What makes gay marriage so much worse than divorce?  [Read the rest of his article here.]

 It is not our job to try to force Christianity and the Bible's views onto others.  We are called to spread the Gospel to others, not turn them away from it.  Thus, we need to represent Christianity in a way that makes it attractive to others.  This does NOT mean we are people pleasers who let sin run rampant, but does mean that we need to consider the reactions of others when we speak and act.  

This is the bottom line for me: What good does it do for the cause of Christianity to fight gay marriage with such vehemence?  In my limited experience, it only drives others away from God.  Non-Christians I've spoken with are utterly confused and angered by Christianity's "closed-minded" and condemning viewpoint regarding homosexuality.  Very rarely is the topic of homosexuality broached by Christians with love, grace, mercy, and the acknowledgement that we are all equally fallen in the eyes of our Savior.  Once it can be discussed cordially, with mutual respect, we can return to the public eye and discuss the Bible's take on homosexuality.  But it is not the Bible's job to dictate America's legislation. Morality is what needs to be legislated; we cannot, not should we attempt to, legislate religion.  I have yet to see a moral argument for the banning of same-sex marriage that stands up outside of Christian circles.

I find many Christian publications arguing against same-sex marriage to be utterly offensive.  One of the most highly-esteemed Christian thinkers of the 20th Century, whom I will not name, wrote an article entitled 'The Problem of Same-Sex "Marriage".'  Did you catch that?  The author put the word "marriage" in parentheses.  Why was that necessary??  The same author writes later, "The gay activists argue that a gay couple can provide just as stable an environment for raising children. They are, however, dead wrong. For one thing, they overlook the pre­dominantly short-term, nonexclusive character of most gay relationships."

That last line hit me like a slap in the face.  "Predominantly short-term"??  "Nonexclusive"?  How stereotypical.  Obviously, a short-term and/or nonexclusive home would be an unhealthy and less-than-ideal environment for raising children.  Can I think of any homes like that?  Yeah, actually, I can, and none of them are homosexual.  Some are even Christian.  According to this website, the current US divorce rate is 50%.  The heterosexual divorce rate.  If we're going to start making arguments like this one, we might as well ban having children due to the likelihood of them being raised in an unstable environment.

It frustrates me that the only acceptable position on homosexuality for Christians is that gay marriage needs to be banned.  Christians such as myself who believe that active homosexuality is not God's plan for us, but also believe that is not a good enough reason to ban gay marriage in a secular nation are seen as lesser Christians, and their political views seen as absolute heresy.  I'm asking you, my readers, to prove me wrong.

Sadly,

Amy

PS - My next post will be on baking with peaches.  This is plenty of political commentary for me for a good long while.

AAAANNNNDD...we have a winner!

Congratulations, Melanie K, you are the official winner of the Amy trivia.  She may have had a slight advantage, seeing as we've been friends for 11 years now.

She posted her comment on my FB wall, since she didn't have any of the accounts required to comment (sorry, guys), so I have pasted her comment below:

"Hmm, well I will guess C, B, A, D, and D, although I don't know how you can think movies A and C are stupid. Although I wish you didn't hate cheesecake, cause it's delicious, I can understand. Also, I totally feel the same way about tea!! Since you've seen "The Holiday" now, I'll tell you the house Cameron Diaz stays in is the type of house I want to own someday. And lastly, if the guy in #6 is who I think it is, yes!! tell him. :)"

Correct answers:

I do not eat cauliflower.  White food weirds me out, especially white food that grows in the ground.  It's just weird.

The animals I'm pet-sitting for are named Tigger, Honeybear, and Smilie, the first two being dogs and the latter being a cat.  You can tell they were named by kids, eh?  But the names actually fit the personalities.

I have never read "Crime and Punishment."  I read "Kidnapped" in middle school and don't really remember it, "The Scarlet Letter" in high school and enjoyed it, and have read "The Brothers Karamazov" TWICE.  If that doesn't earn me some sort of prize, I don't know what does.

At the time of the quiz, my fingers were painted pink, which is odd for me, and my toes were green--mint sorbet, to be exact.  Thanks to Rachel T. for introducing me to that color!  My toes remain green, but my fingernails are now painted purple.  *Ahem* lovely lilac.  I feel like a menopausal scrapbooking fanatic when I write that.  "Excuse me, Sally, could you pass me the lovely lilac cardstock?  It matches the shirt I'm going to put on after I stop sweating from having a hot flash."  But I digress.

I did NOT think "Up" was stupid.  In fact, it's one of my favorites.  "Wall-E", "Despicable Me", and "Madagascar" were all mediocre, in my opinion, although I wish Steve Carrell would've used that accent on "The Office."

So there you have it!

Last time I spoke with Melanie, she was still thinking about which dessert she wanted..."There are so many good choices!"  I think I'll use that as my excuse to post my first cooking demo.  Be kind to me.

Sidenote: Wisconsin weather in summer is super bipolar.  Four days ago the high temperature was 94 F.  Today?  55, with a low of 43.  FORTY-THREE.  If this was fall, we'd all be covering our petunias and bringing our precious prize-winning geraniums inside to avoid the frost.  So I've been sitting on the couch all day, in a sweatshirt and socks, curled up in a blanket.  I'm currently contemplating a cup of hot chocolate.

Shiveringly,

Amy